17 year old dating a 20 year old
It won’t magically give you confidence that you didn’t have before, it won’t change how you think or make you empirically more or less attractive.Anything you gain from sex was, ultimately, within you from the start.For some, it’s a quest to lose our virginity the night of The Big School Event (Homecoming, Prom, Spring Formal, what-have-you) because it’s part of the modern high-school mythology that we’ve made up.For others it’s trying to beat a particular date – our 18th or 21st birthdays, high-school or college graduation, before summer’s over, before getting married.Some may become bitter and resentful, feeling as though they’re being cheated of something that they’re rightfully “owed”.Others will have their pre-existing approach anxiety ramped up to near pathological levels, leaving them with anxiety attacks and a crippling shyness around people they’re attracted to.Here’s the hard and fast truth about virgins and virginity: it’s a completely cultural construct.
Some may have had physical intercourse with another person – oral sex, mutual masturbation, possibly even anal sex – but consider themselves virgins because they’ve never had penile/vaginal sex.
To be a virgin is no different, ultimately, from never having eaten Chinese food or having been to Disneyland.
In fact, you could reasonably equate the two; more often than not, you wait for too damn long for a thrill that’s over in under 3 minutes and half the time you’re wondering what the big deal was.
There is no difference between a person who has had sex and someone who hasn’t.
Even a woman’s hymen is no demarcator of virginity; many will rupture their hymen long before they’ve had penetrative vaginal intercourse.
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We are taught to measure a man’s value by the number of sex partners he’s had; the more women he’s seduced, the greater the value.